Thanks Tony, thank Jimmy.
Tony - when I go over photos of older Volvos, you can clearly see relays on the REM. On mine, there simply are none, although a car parts place had no problem selling me a relay for a 2010 for ~$12. I thought about the foot pedal switch as that seems to be a trend with Volvos, but I thought if that was acting up, I would not get the high stop lamp.
Jimmy - you highlighted what I was afraid of, as it looked like the REM had to have a number of internal components and that there is some short somewhere that I wont be able to find without help. I just hate going to the dealer for anything. I have done just about everything you can to a car (rebuilt motors, trannies, brakes, suspension) and it bugs me to have to trust some one else. Oh well, guess it is time to quit crying and take it in before I make it worse.