It looks to me that you have touched so far on the most possible causes for your problem but the ECU itself.This is getting insane!!! Even if it's the ecu somehow causing this problem I can't even get the thing out and if I do swap the one from the other car is will have to be programmed.
I would concentrate on finding a way testing the ECU inputs/outputs that control the Fuel Injection system before giving up.
jmmxc






